Monday, January 17, 2011

The Divide in the Black Community

I have to admit it.

The past few days have been filled with more grief and sadness over the state of the people I call my own, more than any other time.And it all started when I went to a gossip site to find out more about a mixed high-school basketball player that I wrote about in my Post, "Happy New Year..". From there, my head has been spinning reading the comments of Black women and Black men tear each other to shreds over everything from looks, to dating preferences. I have even read blogs that while promoting the Black female in Interracial relationships, simultaneously puts down virtually every Black man at the same time.



I nearly cried.

I mean, I personally tend to lead towards white men -because a lot of my interests tend to fall outside of what most Black men seem to think is acceptable...like NASCAR, hunting, Braves baseball, Dodge Rams, Carrie Underwood and belts that actually hold one's jeans up. Heck, a couple of years ago I had the chance to meet Roscoe Dash just after he blew up nation wide...I had no idea who the guy was, and had actually preferred the blue grass group that performed before him at the tail gate I was at. -But my usual preference for white guys does NOT mean that I think Black men not worthy of my time.

On the other side of the coin was all of the nasty remarks made by Black men degrading Black Women for dating and/or marrying outside of our race. I mean with all of the hate being thrown back and forth, is it any wonder that our community is falling behind virtually every other minority group in every statistical category that counts. Furthermore, we seem to be the only ethnic group to have individuals who are so ashamed of their families and of our collective recent history that they actively and openly state the fact that they wish they had been born white.

I mean besides for athletic purposes, when do you actually hear whites or Asians talking about how they wish they had been born Black....?

And for the most part it is for the reasons above that we have such problems. We lack respect and appreciation for each other in the most basic instances. We blame, whine about, and lash out at each other like we're on Survivor, believing the hype that only one of us can survive. At the rate we're going, neither of us will make it.

I am not trying to call for more Black couples, nor am I trying to call for all out unity, but on this day that we celebrate Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., I am calling for mutual respect, and moreover for more respect of our own history. And where does this begin? Where everything begins, in the home.

Because from respect for our history and what our parents and grand-parents did for us, maybe we'd be less likely to pass up the opportunity to get an education. Maybe with more respect for our history, we'd be less likely to be ok with receiving welfare checks. We would want to make contributions to society and would want to be in stable, loving relationships.

We would stop airing our dirty laundry on TV, over the internet or in music Nationwide. We would be proud of each other, and would celebrate our accomplishments and police ourselves. We would hold each other accountable and not leave our children to be raised by Barney and SpongeBob. We would value knowledge and value each unique thing about ourselves.

We would lift each other up in prayer and take joy in each and every Black man and Black woman who is able to find someone who treasures them for who they are. We would not be threatened by a man or woman of another race loving our own, and would celebrate the fact that perhaps with each interracial marriage, we are bridging gaps between cultures and families who might not understand otherwise how much they should value us as well.

Oh, if only....

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