No man? No true success...

Today I was talking to my cousin, who is the American Black Chick in Europe, who is actually back in the States for a little bit.

As I talked with her, I realized that we both go through a lot of similar experiences with our families where it concerns men. She has just finished her Masters Degree while studying in London, and has also lived in France for the past three to six months, but what was the first question she got from her extended family who hadn't seen her in at least two years?....Well it wasn't "how was France?"or even "Congrats on your Masters!", or heck, "What do you plan to do now that you've finished Grad School?"



Nope... it sounded more like "So are you seeing anyone?"

&It;..........................................&It;

Really? (I realize that I use that word a lot but...the alternative is not very Godly....so 'Really' it is.)

Now, I am pretty conservative, and I do believe in the whole getting married and kids thing, but the fact that as a female, my accomplishments are diminished by my family is a pretty HUGE deal. Perhaps this is why there are so few female CEO's  in fortune 500 companies.

I mean what's the point of working hard, and getting success on the job, if when you get home, no one congratulates you on anything you've done, but instead asks "where's your man?"

Thankfully I personally don't deal with this nearly as much as my much maligned cousin. My folks seem to know not to broach such a subject if they want me around for Thanksgiving and Christmas :-). After all there are many sporting events that I can choose to be at if they want to get on me about my persistent singleness.

As a matter of fact I am watching the Lakers and Suns right now....I am cheering on the team of the rising SUN,  ie not Kobe.

 I am not at all suggesting that it is unimportant for a woman to get married, but I am perpetually ticked that I am looked at as less than because I do not have a kid or a wedding band.

Sidenote: Kobe get off the floor you are not HURT you baby!!!!!!!! I admit it, I'm a Kobe hater, I know he is really good, and I don't care, I don't like him. And since the government doesn't require me to like him or Lebron...then I shall oblige and hate on both of them, thank you!

Back to my rant, my Grandmother did do her best to try and get me to think long and hard about getting into a relationship. While I was on the phone with my Dad one day, she asked him to ask me for my address. I gave it to him thinking that my Grandma was going to send me a gift of some kind....

Yeah....it was a gift alright. She sent me an article that she read in the newspaper with the heading "Where to find good men".

In the margins my Grandmother wrote in barely legible script, "Share with your sister".  I wasn't sure whether I wanted to call my Grandmother and cuss her out, (JK that sooo wouldn't happen, she'd back slap me through the phone lol) or Laugh at the ridiculousness of the whole ordeal. To make matters worse, or better, the article actually had nothing to do with the heading, so she sent me this article that I couldn't even pick apart and argue with SMH.

To say the least I did neither, I called her, and the imp that is my Grandmother answered the phone and asked, "Did you get my letter?" This was asked with a definite smile on her face LOL.

 My response was said with an equally devilish smile, "Yes".

Grandma: "Well?"

Me: "Grandma did you actually read the article?"

Grandma: "Nah, that was for you! Did you like it?"

Me: "Hmmm, sure, but for future reference, you might want to read the full article before sending it out  Grandma... but thank you all the same."

I know I could have been truly evil, but I promised my Mother a long time ago that I would not be the cause of my Grandma's death. So I stay as nice as possible, and besides the occasional, (read every time I see her), questions about me meeting a nice young man, she mostly leaves me and my younger sister alone.

Unfortunately for others, I am in the minority where it comes to females not having to deal with their family's obsessions with their love-lives...or lack thereof.

So what have I learned?
That I am lucky that my family is super scared of incurring my wrath if they want to get super into my lack-of-love life.

Problems?
Not so far....