Thursday, May 17, 2012

Motivated by Fear

Being scared to lose, and wanting to win are two completely different things. Sometimes they produce the same results...but most of the times not.

It seems backwards that the two aren't completely in sync with each other right????

I mean if I'm scared to lose...I should really, really, really want to win....but that is soooo not the case.

In a sports analysis, the metaphor is simple. And one can see it clearly. If it's basketball, I refuse to shoot the ball, instead looking for someone with a better shot on the court. If it's baseball, I never take the bat off of my shoulder in hopes that the pitcher will walk me. If it's football....I kick the field goal instead of going for it at 4th and 1 inch from their 1 yard line....The list can go on and on, but the moral remains the same.

The same goes in life, I'm learning more and more.

Instead of calling someone out of the blue, I text...because I don't want to interrupt them. Instead of asking the guy if he'd like to take my phone number....I jet off like I didn't even think about exchanging contact info. Instead of asking a public question on Facebook, I take to the private message to ease my pain when/if no one answers.

It all sounds disconnected from original premise, but the link is there. When Fear becomes what moves a person, you move in ways that halt real communication and real connection. In games, fear prevents a person from clearly seeing the situation for what it is, and often costs teams games.

We all know I'm not the hugest Lakers fan....ok so I'm not one at all, save for that one
But in any case, the game last night, on Wednesday night, when the Lakers were up by 7 with 2 minutes left to play and managed to loose by 2 was all about fear of loosing and what it does to a normally competant team.

With under a minute left and the Lakers barely holding onto a 1 point lead over the OKC Thunder, the Lakers inbound the ball after the clock has stopped, by allowing the ball to be rolled to almost half court....W...T.....??????? Seriously.

For those who could care less about basketball, let me give you this nugget. When a game is determined by time, and you are in the are praying for time to fly by so that you can record the Win. And since the game clock does not start back up after it has stopped until the ball has been touched by a plyer on the court...then the Lakers SHOULD have touched the ball immediately so that the clock could start. Instead, the clock didn't begin for a good 5 eternity in basketball.

Kobe Bryant also gave a pretty stellar performance of what fear can do to even the most elite veteran on the court, just moments before with two consecutive turnovers in a row. But the rolling of the ball took the cake for me.

And I'm trying as hard as Hades not to live my life like that. Because when I'm motivated by fear, I tend to not do anything. I tend to wait, and halt all movement out of fear of making the wrong choice. Furthermore, I tend to not listen to that small voice in my head that says that I should reach out to ____fill in the blank :-). I stall, grow small, and completely miss the boat. It's the worst case scenario for anybody.

So, I am trying to get better, and to work on that. It's hard, but I do believe worth it. Because in the end...I want to win...!!!!!!!!!! :-)

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